The problem is you’ll be hated if you are real, and being loved if you are fake

Y’all might seen the new Joker movie already ? i read the reviews, movie been loved and hated at the same time, some people said the movie kinda violent and disturbing , some said the movie is fun , dark. Brilliant and etcetera etcetera..

i am not talking about the movie but about our reaction , our judgementality, our way of thinking , how i see life in general, how to react to something.

i have been moving from one place to the others massively around the globe in the past months, observing my way of thinking, and all above , at this instant i most than certain i kinda fuck up with my thought, i am the most judgemental, racist, stubborn, fake and self centred selfish human being on this planet !!! ..

Sometimes being selfish is a way to cope with depression, anxiety and mentally disturbed by lots of issues , you lost trust in people and trying to hold on to something , read self help book and you totally desperate and seek help to something up there , hope you find a peace of mind .

Until i watched this movie and realised, good people could snap and turn bad and did something they actually never intended to do , so sad .

On my journey i met lots of people fighting with their inner battle, trying to be something they are not , to be loved and so scared to Show their vulnerability. It became a way of life, being fake more acceptable , loved .. I was so shocked to discover this, so scary and disturbing .

i watched myself in the mirror and ask myself : Do

i want to be a joker? would i keep pleasig people to be loved? The answer my friends is kinda easy , i wanted to be treated like i treated people , i dont want to be fake, i dont want to be a pleaser, i dont want to cover up my life, I am Me, people accept it or not their call , not mine ! I don’t want to deffending myself , if this mean i would loose my circle of friends than be it ... i don‘t want to stay on Cope stand, i wanna be happy , a happy lowland warrior , a happy princess , a happy globe trotter, a happy kid of God and a happy human being .....

What do you seek in life my friends ?

Eindhoven , Oct 22nd.